Test Results

I picked up my copy of Alexia's test results yesterday. Apparently the only reason that she was not placed into the first grade is because she was "wiggly, distractable and very talkative." What kind of a reason is that?? Her academic skills were extremely high. Her percentile rank was >99.9
It said that she is reading at a 2.8 grade level. Her adaptive behavior skills are that of a 7 year 7 month old (except her socializations skills which are that of a 10 year old).
I understand that its probably better for her socially to be in Kindergarten, but she is going to be SO bored when it comes to actually learning things. There was even a note at the bottom of the test results:
"If Alexia is placed in kindergarten rather than first grade, she will need to be carefully placed in math and reading groups appropriate for her skill level."
So instead of being the smart kid in first grade, she gets to be the SUPER smart kid in kindergarten. Ugh. I went through this when I was a kid, but I did get to go to first instead of K. Even with the skipped grade, I was still in the talented and gifted program, and in advanced classes. I was bored all the way through school. I was 'removed' from a class my senior year because I told my teacher she was wrong....and then I proved it. I wasn't challenged at all. School held me back. I don't want Alexia to feel the same way. I am going to do some real research into finding a private school for her. I would love to homeschool her, but I don't have the patience to do it. At least I can admit that, and not lose patience with her for something that isn't her fault.
Why does public school suck so hard?

Finally...

I got a call from the principal today. Alexia is going to be starting in Kindergarten. Her test scores needed to be in the 97th percentile, and hers weren't consistent. She had some scores that were "Exceptionally Superior" and others that were just "High Average". At least now I know.

Self-pity post...

I went in to Alexia's school today. Apparently they have a new principal. So all the conversations that I had with last year's principal mean nothing now. Nobody in the office new anything about the test results, but I met with the new principal and she said she'd call the district office and ask them. So again, I have to wait. I don't know if she's going into K or 1st, so I don't know when she starts. 1st-6th start on the 7th, K starts on the 10th. K also has alternating days, so if she is in K, I don't even know if she'll go MWF or TTF. ARGH!!! Don't even get me started on school supplies! What kind of school needs each kid to bring 24 glue sticks?!?!

I think I need to see a therapist or something. I think I have PPD. Lucky doesn't think I do, because when I'm around other people, I'm smiling and laughing. He doesn't understand that half the time its forced, and the other half the time, I'm only happy because I'm out of my damn house! I find myself crying for no good reason. People keep asking me if I am pregnant because I get so emotional. That makes me even more sad. I want to have another baby so bad, but I'm really scared. I don't want another c/s. My only real choice is homebirth, and I can't do that in this nasty little apartment. I want a house that I can be comfortable in. I want a supportive husband. I want someone to guarantee me that I won't have to be cut open again! Knowing that this isn't possible, I know that before I can get pregnant again, I have to come to terms with my c/s's. I cry as I type this. There is only one person that I've really talked to about this (you know who you are, and I love you for it!). She's the only one who really seems to understand, even just a little. Its hard. Most of my family is mainstream. Not 'anti-natural', but just not into it. They don't understand. My mom had a c/s, my aunt had one, they were both fine with it. I am not! They never had PPD because of it. I've even had people say, "Well, at least you didn't have to feel the pain of childbirth". What kind of shit is that? I also didn't get to feel the joy of pushing my child out, and gently bringing them into the world. No, all 3 of my kids were ripped out of my abdomen!

Ok...the screen is blurring too much now, I need to stop this.

Nothing new...

I seriously need to update this more often. Maybe if something exciting ever happened, then I would have something to write about.
Lately its just been more of the same. Lucky and I are fighting as always. The kids are...kids. I think Loki got a tooth though. He bit me and drew blood. Ouch! I can't really see much, but I'm pretty sure I feel something in there.
I get to "get away" tomorrow. My mom is taking Alexia, Loki and me to go school shopping for Alexia. I can't believe my little girl is starting school!! I still don't know if they're putting her in K or 1st. I was told that the principal would call me after he looked over the test results. I haven't heard anything yet, so I'll probably be calling next week. Maybe I'll update more then...